joy Anderson
@joyanderson211333
1 year ago
I never understood or knew what the word love meant .At 29 years old ,I still don't have a fraction as to what it feels like ,maybe it's not meant for me .
The first time I heard the word was from my father's mouth .He said those words right after hitting my mother across the face "Janet ,you know I love you right " he said while holding her teary face in his hands .That very moment made me still and I still can't forget the fear I felt ,the fear I saw on my mother's face .I even even feared to breathe hoping the sounds of me inhaling and exhaling air from my mouth won't add to the tension.
I had so many questions in that moment ,was this how love was ?,was love a violent feeling that makes you lash out at your loved one ?.Neither did I know the answer nor did anyone want to answer those questions ,who would want to answer the questions of a 12 year old child talking about love at such a young age .
After the sweet violent scene my mother hugged me tightly to her chest and I said the same words "I love you mom " to her ,they made her eyes water ,she was about to cry ,I felt it .In that moment she told me the biggest lie that ruined me "honey ,I love you too and I want you to understand that love is a beautiful feeling ".She told me a contrast to what I saw and made me believe it .Little did she know that little lie would one day ruin me and it all began when I heard those three sweet dangerous words from his mouth .
#short stories
#toxic love
#violence
#Nircleshortstories
