Daniel Okebalama
@danielokebalama185573
11 months ago

#inmyhood
So there's this bet shop beside my house where I go to watch football matches. This shop is the centre of adult male cruise and jokes in my hood.
I was given a nickname so shocking that I haven't recovered from it myself. The disturbing thing is that in the whole area, I'm now officially known by that name, 'Babalawo'. But before you start shouting, "the blood of Jesus," let me tell you the crazy story behind the name.
Well, we were watching a fairly boring match that afternoon and decided to distract ourselves. The banter went back and forth and slowly drifted into the validity for the concept of reincarnation. I got too excited and began to say things I fairly regret.
My grandfather was a leader of a cult, allegedly a sorcerer and here's where the problem is — I am a carbon copy of him! My uncle, especially when he is drunk calls me his dad (he used to say, "Daddy I knew you would come back to me," and it gives me the creeps). In his cult, the members of the cult are supposed to be buried under the room in which they sleep. My uncles and my dad have expressly warned me to make sure I never sleep in the selfsame room, as since I am my grandad's reincarnation, if I do, I'd die (I have slept there countless times😅).
I told these guys this story and one of them said, "So you be babalawo like this, oya tell me wetin your club (Chelsea) go play against Arsenal tomorrow." So as not to kill the vibe, I said, "Palmer will score tomorrow and Mudryk will give the assist."
The next day, the very first goal that was scored was a penalty by Palmer. And when we checked well enough, the penalty was as a result of Mudryk's effort to score.
The same guy said, "True true you be babalawo, E happen as you talk am," and the name stood to this day.
So, you can call me your favourite neighbourhood babalawo 😂